Where to begin? I guess a good place is at the beginning. I remember the first big conflict that Matt and I had. Ironically it was about what a date night was and it was in the middle of a Christian marriage conference!!! You’d think we’d have been pros at dating each other since we had dated for over 2 years and only been married about 2 months, but each of our understandings of what a date night was seemed like opposites. When told that we had an evening free during the conference to go on a date night, I was ready to do something fun together and laugh and play (bowling, mini golf, coffee …) but Matt was ready for a nice dinner out complete with dessert and a movie afterwards. Just spending time with him was romantic and fun to me, but his idea of a date was pampering me and treating me to something special. (It really does come down to expectations!) Just knowing what our ideas of a date night were helped us understand each other’s desires. We still have debates (no longer arguments!) about what to do together on a date night, but we try to talk it through and be flexible and reasonable (with time and with finances) as we decide what to do together!
Ah, conflict. July 24, 2008