Budget: A four lettered word? October 6, 2009

Yes.  I hate the budget.  I hate most everything that the budget represents, except the part where it helps us to save money.  :-)  There are several reasons I dislike the word “budget!” so much:

1. I am the spender in our marriage, so it’s HARD for me to stay within a budget.  It almost always feels much too confined/restrictive.

2. I am also slightly Type-A.  So breaking the budget month after month is very frustrating and feels like I’m constantly failing.

3. I strive for efficiency by nature.  Taking the time to outline a budget – just to then break it pains me to no end.

So, where does that leave us?  Well, it left us in a state of almost total disfuction for the first 6 years of our marriage.  We have never bounced a check or overdrawn an account, and rarely have carried a balance on a credit card.  But nonetheless, it’s been a struggle.  That is until we attended an FPU class this last winter.  Several thing happened during that class for me- only one of which was moving to a cash system.  We’re almost a year in and it’s worked GREAT!  We have paid down almost all of our van loan and put more into savings than previous years as well.  (That’s a small miracle when you keep in mind that my husband recieved what amounted to a 9% paycut last school year.)

In reality at this point our budget looks daily like any other envelope system out there.  We virtually spend all of our money on payday and assign it to different areas for that month:  Christmas, Car Loan, Savings, Food, Utilities, Gas, Haircuts, Gifts, Household, Entertainment, etc…  Some areas empty out to zero each month, others accumulate and then when we need the $ for that area, it’s already there.  It’s amazingly simple…and amazingly brilliant.  Why don’t they teach this stuff in high school?

:-)

Chill Time August 24, 2009

This week we are talking about how we refresh as a family. Here’s a recent picture of my kids chilling out.

As you can see, we like to go hang out in the great outdoors. We just returned from 3 days camping at our favorite state park on Lake Superior. There is something refreshing about being out of the city where the kids can run and not hit a fence or a street for quite awhile. It is also a relief just to be with our family for a period of time where we aren’t trying to get anything done and don’t have any engagements or deadlines.

Not just on vacation, but in everyday life we find it helpful to purposefully have down time. Andrew and I tend to be  project-oriented people, but doing non-stop projects wears on us all after awhile (i.e. the kitchen project). We have found that it’s important for us to spend days or evenings with the simple  goal of being together. The time doesn’t have to be  elaborate. Grilling in the backyard is one of my happiest family times because everyone is there, we’re outdoors doing low-maintenance cooking, and we can be together while we’re doing it. Plus, it’s fun for the kids because we call it a picnic.

The wonders of the Mall of America July 28, 2009

Kate and Leah amazed at how much larger Dora is than they had imagined.

Nonstop excitement for Kate and Andie on the ferris wheel.

Andie checking out legoman’s muscles.

At this point, Gretchen and her family were still in the car (11 hours for the second day, AFTER having had stomach flu on a trip) so she missed out on the MOA trip.

Remembering… June 10, 2009

This month marks a strange anniversary of sorts for me.  It was 2 years ago this month that I was sitting in a chair looking at my unborn baby in 4D.  She was precious!  We had previously found out that our baby had several “markers” for down syndrome and had enlarged kidneys which may have required surgery upon birth.  Thus we were monitored more carefully and had a ton more ultrasound shots at a hospital.  This was the first level 3 ultrasound with this pregnancy (I had had one with my 3rd with no problems).  I got to gaze upon my baby for almost a full hour – it was wonderful!  I was there alone as my husband was out of town.  The specialist doctor called me in after the ultrasound to go over the findings.  The first words out of his mouth to me were “Well you will have to come in tomorrow for your abortion because of how far along you are.”  I was utterly shocked and devastated.  All I could do was mutter “What??????”  He then proceeded to tell me that my baby had more “markers” for down syndrome and it didn’t look good.  I was more shocked that his automatic assumption was that I would abort my baby.  I almost couldn’t comprehend what he was telling me in that office.  All I wanted to do was run as far away from that man as possible.

As soon as I was able to speak again I called my doctor.  He was able to calm me down and after talking to him I decided against the amnio to find out for sure and thus my pregnancy went on not knowing whether or not I was going to have a baby with down syndrome.  For me at that point the risk of miscarriage outweighed the need to know.  What I did do was to research as much as possible about down syndrome to prepare.  What I found out is what I want to remember and never forget.  I do not know what the implications of this knowledge will be for my life but I am confident that this ordeal was not an accident.  I found that over 90% of babies that are diagnosed with down syndrome are aborted.  Those words the doctor spoke to me were for a reason and out of his experience.  This has chilled me to the bone.  Another fact I found was that even if your baby is diagnosed with down syndrome there is no way to tell what function level the child will be at.  Some children with down syndrome go on to graduate from high school and lead independent lives.  Others will require continual care.  The point is that they can not tell you what the function level of the child will be.  Having a special needs child is hard.  It is life changing.  It alters the family in ways that are not predictable.  But who are we to judge who lives and dies?

Our fourth daughter was born in August with no physical problems.  Her kidneys were fine and she did not have down syndrome.  What my heart went through in the months of not knowing I hope and pray will never leave me.

Christian + artist May 26, 2009

If Leah is Practical Polly, it’s possible that my name should be Impractical Inez. Thankfully for me, I already have a name: Artsie Andie. This week, I’m going to be sharing a bit of the process God has been leading me through in seeking to find out how to live out His call on my life as a Christian Artist.

This combination has not always resided peacefully within me.  I think it started to coexist more happily my senior year of college when a friend told me that I must start taking art classes again. I had stopped several years earlier under the mistaken understanding that my time as a Christian was better spent “serving the Lord” than in the art room. Due to my friend’s encouragement, I began to understand that  being who I am, rather than who I am not, is the way I am called to serve him.

Around that time, I read an article that completely encouraged me written by my current pastor (only God knew at that point I would be moving to Minneapolis!). The article is entitled God is not Boring. It was a sweet reminder of the fact that God is the Creator; To be creative is imitating Him! This article was also part of what helped my analytical husband begin to embrace and enjoy my artwork more fully. He is so supportive of me as an artist now and that gives me freedom to develop this part of my life all the more.

More on the intersection of artist + wham later….

Just say….YES! September 10, 2008

Who’s the optimist in your house?  The optimist in ours tells me that I am the ‘realist’ (err, pessimist- for your other ‘realists’ out there!).  During the week, when the optimist is at work, my kids are left at home with their ‘realist’ mother.  It becomes very easy for me to focus on the things in my kids’ behavior that I would like to see fixed….in other words, they hear a lot of “No, Sam…” and “Stop doing that, Maggie….”.  I have to make a choice in my day to fight my negative impulses and seek out ways to encourage my kids.  I want them to hear more “Yes you may, Sam!” and “Good Job, Maggie!” – than “No!”.  SO, Mom’s who forget to say “Yes!”- step out and do it!  Encourage your kids (and maybe even your spouse too!) and be blessed by the change it makes in your home that day!

Getting through the day… September 9, 2008

Ok I am going to share my secret to getting through long days of throw up and messes and potty training… music.  As a busy mom I often forget about music and how it can effect my moods for good or bad.  I also used to really pay attention to new music and the latest artist but these days I am just happy to keep track of my current supply of coffee.  I am a punk at heart and often have very different tastes in music than my other mom friends.  I really like Sara Groves and such but on some days I need something a little harder like Thousand Foot Crutch Rawk Fist :)  When it is the end of the day the same music that helps me push my run to the next mile is the same music that helps me clean up the kitchen and the potty mess.  The tools that help me keep moving when I want to drop into bed are my little shuffle so I can blast music anywhere I am cleaning and a little secret called www.pandora.com  Pandora will make a station that will play songs like the artist or song you type in.  This has really helped me broaden my music taste and find artists I might like but do not hear about much.  (You can also type in broad genres like salsa or swingin Christmas, so fun)  So there it is!

Hi ladies! I’m Leah. August 29, 2008

Hi!  I’m the newest addition to this fun blog for WHaM’s and those of you aspiring to be a WHaM someday.  My name is Leah and I’m a wife to one and a mother to three.  My husband, Eric, and I have been married since December 2002.  Sam and Maggie are 2 years old (but for only 3 more weeks!), and our youngest boy, Miles, just turned 2 months.  Sam is ALL BOY and Maggie is a goofy Mama’s girl who loves to dress up.  **wonder where she gets this from, asks Andie** Miles is a sweet little boy whose smile is melting our hearts these days.  My husband is a high school science teacher and I am so proud of the way he loves the kids that God puts in his classroom.  He does an amazing job.

I LOVE being a wife and mother!  And although the last few years of my life don’t show it (twins tend to ground you a bit), I LOVE spending time outdoors!  I am a super practical, efficient type gal but don’t really consider myself too creative.  I LOVE to read and LOVE to blog.  But my true WHaM LOVE  is cooking.  I LOVE to cook and try new recipes…we probably try something new at least once a week….and yes, my kids try it too.  :-)

If you don’t use iGoogle, you should :) August 15, 2008

I love my google homepage. I can see if all the blogs I read have new posts, I keep a to-do list, check the weather, news headlines, etc. Just go to google and you can start your own. If you need any tips, feel free to ask.

- to add a blog feeder to your page:

• go to “add stuff” on the right side of your google theme, 
• In the very bottom of the left column of the page that comes up, it says: add feed or gadget with the little orange symbol. To add your favorite blog, type in the address and press “add” 
• Return to your homepage by clicking “Back to igoogle home” in top left

Kate’s Intro July 10, 2008

My name is Kate and I am a WHAM too (surprise!)  I love spending my spare time doing anything crafty – scrapbooking, card making, knitting or crocheting, anything with pictures … I’ll give anything a try at least once!  While this might sound creative or artistic, I really am very practical too!  I love doing things with my hands and helping others, so I’m trying to learn more about gardening and also started doing freezer cooking at the end of last year.  It’s a great joy to see how this can bless my family and others too.

Matt and I have been married for 8 years and have 2 wonderful children.  Sammy is a bundle of energy at almost 3 years old and has been talking non-stop for the last year and a half.  Zoe is our sweet little girl who is trying to keep up with her big brother.  Matt is currently serving in the music ministry by working at the sound board and I help with the MOPS group at our church.  Neither of our families are here in the area, but we have a wonderful ‘family’ in our Bible study group and a church family that we love dearly.

I look forward to sharing more with you as the weeks progress ….