Hi ladies! I’m Leah. August 29, 2008

Hi!  I’m the newest addition to this fun blog for WHaM’s and those of you aspiring to be a WHaM someday.  My name is Leah and I’m a wife to one and a mother to three.  My husband, Eric, and I have been married since December 2002.  Sam and Maggie are 2 years old (but for only 3 more weeks!), and our youngest boy, Miles, just turned 2 months.  Sam is ALL BOY and Maggie is a goofy Mama’s girl who loves to dress up.  **wonder where she gets this from, asks Andie** Miles is a sweet little boy whose smile is melting our hearts these days.  My husband is a high school science teacher and I am so proud of the way he loves the kids that God puts in his classroom.  He does an amazing job.

I LOVE being a wife and mother!  And although the last few years of my life don’t show it (twins tend to ground you a bit), I LOVE spending time outdoors!  I am a super practical, efficient type gal but don’t really consider myself too creative.  I LOVE to read and LOVE to blog.  But my true WHaM LOVE  is cooking.  I LOVE to cook and try new recipes…we probably try something new at least once a week….and yes, my kids try it too.  :-)

Before you are married… August 28, 2008

Ooh, what a fun topic!  There is so much that I am glad that I did/learned before I was married and yet so much more that I could have done to prepare also!  (Is anyone really ever ‘ready’?)

Learn to budget!  While it doesn’t seem all that necessary while single, it is oh sooo needed in a marriage!  I was budget-minded before I was married and aware of what I spent, but had never lived on my own and actually written out a budget until a few years after Matt and I were married!  It has been such a good thing for us to work together on our budget.  I can only imagine how wonderful it would be to come into marriage with some knowledge and practice already!   Stay out of credit card debt and think about saving (what a great thing to come into a marriage with some money for an emergency fund, a wedding, car or house!)

Learn to process and share things with other people.  Seems like basic communication, but it’s vital to a marriage!  You can practice this in a small Bible study, with a mentor/discipler, with your mom or even just a close girlfriend.

Be prepared for the ‘everyday’ of life.  Like the other gals have mentioned, cleaning, cooking, dishes, and laundry are all things that must be done!  Practice them … even if it’s just in a dorm room :)  You can always come practice at my house too ;)  It’s fun to talk and work at the same time!

Cleaning Help for Kids August 27, 2008

This resource looks cool. The idea is that there are “zones” in the house for cleaning. Each zone has step by step cleaning instructions with pictures that the kids can check off.  I think Ruth is almost to the age where she has enough attention span to do this!

Preparing for Marriage August 26, 2008

Some things I did while I was single that helped prepare me for marriage were:

• Lived with others (roommates)
• had a loose plan for my life with desires and goals
• took advantage of as many Bible studies or classes I could
• learned how to live within a budget

Some things I wish I would have done:

• spent more time investing in relationships with girls
• learned how to cook and clean (my Mom worked more than full time and I really never learned what it was to cook or clean every day.  I learned all I know from the internet out of necessity.  I really wish I would have valued taking care of a home a lot more than I did.)
• spent time with married people and families outside of social gatherings – I wish I would have helped out moms and had an older couple already in my life before I was married.  I wish I would have entertained families to serve them and also to prepare myself for what life would be like when I wasn’t throwing big parties for single people or going out all the time.  I had quite a shock after marriage :)

Well here are just a few little tips that I think of when asked what are some things to do to prepare for marriage :)  I had a very high view of doing and a very low view of what it means to be a woman.  I  actually had no idea of what it meant to be a woman :)  The Lord is gracious to humble us and teach us and I am so thankful for His patient guidance of me.  Becoming a wife and mother has been one of the most humbling and beautiful processes the Lord is taking me through.  God is faithful!!

Using your singleness to prepare for marriage August 25, 2008

 

We’re going to have a couple weeks of posts specifically for our single readers. Our question this week is:

What  are some beneficial things that a single woman can invest her time in to prepare her for marriage?

My number one suggestion to prepare for marriage is to choose (or stick with) a roommate who is different from you. In college, I lived with a lovely lady named Leah, who will be introducing herself on Friday. We couldn’t be more different. We actually had a list of the 12 things we had in common on our door. There were that few! What I’d give to find that list and laugh at it again! Leah was similar to someone though… and that someone is my husband, Andrew!

Leah and I shared a room. She survived the experience by ignoring that my side of the room looked like a tornado had hit. Leah was very patient and living with her and seeing life from her perspective was helpful for me.  Living with Leah and another roommate who was oh-so-different from me helped me learn to pick up my socks from the living room floor. I would just absentmindedly leave them there, oblivious to the fact that this might bother others. To change my ways and love my roomies, I actually had to pray, “Lord, help me see the socks.” This applied, of course, to many areas of the house. I needed to see the dishes, the laundry, the dirty toilet, and DO SOMETHING about these things.  

So, I know it’s tough, but stick it out with your roomies that have habits that drive you crazy. I promise it will do you good in the long run. Because, while you can go get a new roommate, you can’t go get a new husband :)

As you can see, I’ve edited this post slightly… ha ha. I figured that Leah couldn’t really object because she looks WAAAY better than me in this photo. She’s in the tutu, and this is actually after we were married ladies, but we acted pretty much the same when we were single.

Blueberry Lemon Coffee Cake August 22, 2008

I’m aiming to post my official introduction for you all this week…but in the meanwhile, I’ll give you a recipe for my very favorite meal of the day: Breakfast!  It tastes like it belongs in a coffee shop or bakery and is always a welcome treat on a weekend morning at our house!  Note: Almond paste is found in a can in your baking isle.  It can be somewhat spendy, but one can does several coffee cakes and keeps for a long time in the fridge.  Sliced almonds can be found cheap in the bulk section.

Blueberry Lemon Coffee Cake, serves 6

1 1/2 cups flour

2 t. baking powder

1/4 t. baking soda

1/2 t. salt

1/2 cup sugar

1/3 cup almond paste

2 T. butter

1 egg

1 T. lemon juice

3/4 cup milk

1 1/2 cups blueberries (thaw, if frozen)

Topping:

1/4 cup sugar

3 T. sliced almonds

1 1/2 T. butter, melted

1/2 t. cinnamon

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.  Spray 8×8 inch baking dish with cooking spray.  In medium bowl, combine flour, baking powder, baking soda, and salt. Set aside.  Combine sugar thru milk, then add dry ingredients.  Fold in blueberries and spoon into 8×8 dish.  Combine topping ingredients, spread over batter.  Bake 35 minutes, or until center is set.

Keeping Perspective??? August 21, 2008

Well I am so sorry this post is not on time.  I have had visitors all week and been unusually busy with the approach of school as well.  Anyway…

The way I usually maintain perspective is to read.  I do not get much time to read with babies and kids and toddlers but I really try to get some time during the day.  The reading I love to do is great classic books.  Right now I am reading Hard Times by Dickens.  These are the tried and true literature that speaks to the ages and pulls me out of my little world.  It helps to realize that there is truly nothing new under the sun and the moments I have with my children and taking care of a home are truly fleeting.  I also really like keeping up with international news and issues.  I love learning about different cultures and conflicts.  It helps me to realize that there is a huge world around me and I need to raise my kids in light of that, not what the latest trend in clothes are or the “right” activity to be involved in.   I have found as a mom it is easy to lose perspective and for me learning of life outside my bubble really helps me to be truly thankful for all that we have and the unique time we live in to raise our kids and keep a house.

One other thing that has helped was a little retreat my husband sent me on recently.  We just moved and I had been totally exhausted (from packing up a household of 6 in 3 days by myself).  Lukas booked me a hotel room and dropped me off for a night of rest.  I literally slept most of the time away.  I think sleep really helps me keep perspective :)  I was a new woman after that night.  So I highly recommend sleep to keep perspective!

Encouragement for single homemakers August 21, 2008

As we mentioned in Our Heart, being a homemaker does not necessitate marriage or owning a house. Each woman has the calling of homemaker and nurturer. GirlTalk is doing a great series on homemaking right now and today there is a post just for you fabulous single ladies.

The heart’s focus August 21, 2008

Keeping perspective is one of THE hardest things for me as a mom!  I can get so easily sucked into the days’ activities, frustrated by constant disobedience, or just overwhelmed by the never-ending tasks around the house!

I was reminded this last week that this is one of the reasons that I so enjoy MOPS!  It is a good place to regain perspective on my life as a mom.  I can be a woman with other women, learn something about what God wants for me as a mom, eat w/o sharing my plate of food with little hands and remember that ‘this too shall pass!’  I am in a crazy season right now as the mom of 2 toddlers (and I do occasionally ask, what was I thinking???) but it is only a season.  The moments (and even years) pass so quickly and I have to remember that in the moments of life.  MOPS is a big encouragement to me, as well as a lot of fun!

On a day to day basis the biggest thing for me to keep my perspective is a quiet cup of coffee with my Bible in the morning BEFORE the kids get up!  If I miss out on this time I am usually royally grumpy for the entire day!  (I’m not kidding!)  It is such a good thing for me to have those 10-30 minutes of quiet each morning w/o the kids.  I enjoy the warm coffee (and get the caffeine that I am all too dependant on!) and a chance to refocus my heart for the day.  Elizabeth George calls this time w/God ‘the great exchange’ – trading in all of your yuckies for all of God’s greats :)  I sure have a lot to trade in!

(Just a note: I had to chuckle as I read Jen’s blog from yesterday after I had already written a draft for my own entry this week.  :)  I totally agree that my focus needs to be on training my kids.  Right now MOPS is an encouragement for me to ‘keep on keeping on’ with this.)

A Mom’s Perspective August 20, 2008

My perspective as a mom keeps changing over the years.  I have learned to let go of the little things and focus on the big things for my kids.  The most important thing for me as a mom is to raise my kids in godliness.  That is my most important job here on this earth.  That is how I rate myself as a mom.  If I am not focusing on teaching my kids and instructing them in biblical wisdom then I need to look at where my perspective as a mom has strayed.  I think so many times we as moms can get busy in “good” things such as women’s bible study, kid’s sports, MOPS, Once A Month Cooking, etc… and neglect what is our primary role as a mom which is teaching and discipling our kids.  I am not saying that those things mentioned are not good things and that you can’t do them but if it is taking you away from your primary role than you might want to re-think things.  I know especially being a pastor’s wife I felt like I always had to say yes to things or had to be at every church event but another wise pastor’s wife told me where my priorities should be and that is to my husband and my kids first.  Then, if that was taken care of I could add the others as I saw fit.  Life is a vapor and our kids grow up so fast.  We need to take each moment with them and cherish it and use it for God’s glory.  When we lost our daughter Abby I vowed to focus on the precious moments with my kids more and to not worry so much about having the perfect house and the laundry all done.  In light of eternity what is more important, singing Amazing Grace at the top of your lungs and dancing around the room with your kids or having a Martha Stewart home?!